Moving on

Moving on, moving out. Moving in with two guys from back home (brothers, so don’t get any ideas) that has a four bed room apartment in Liljeholmen, or actually on top of the hill above. The apartment block is not such a pretty sight, just a concrete building, a few planted trees and set out playgrounds, but the view, oh the view of the city… I swear when I walked into the living room I felt like I was in New York… ok, that might be an exaggeration, but none the less, the view is great.

So I will be staying with them for a while, which feels good for many reasons. After all the couches I spent my nights on this summer, having a bed, in a room (with a view) is wonderful. That I will actually hang up my clothes in a wardrobe feels like luxury (I can’t believe it’s been six months since I did that) But probably the most important reason is that I won’t be alone.

I won’t begin to tell you about the roller coaster I have been riding, but I’ll tell you that I am starting to feel excited again and not just scared of the next drop.

I am starting to trust the safety of the machinery.

The machinery that is life.

Funny, even though I have shed so many tears in this apartment where I now spend my last night, I admit that we have become a little familiar with each other. You know, my robe on the hook, my shoes in the hall way, my ocean breeze scented candle that Ida gave me as a house present. So when I sit here in bed (there are no tables and the couch is tacky) and listen to the repeating beeping of the fire warning thingy that needs a new battery and that I ripped from the ceiling the other night in bare frustration (still it beeps) I think that I will remember the good things.

This cup for example. What a great cup! We have had some good tea times. And the path through the woods to work, kicking leaves, or stumbling on roots at 5.30 in the misty morning light. The window in the bath room that let’s cold air in when you take a hot shower.

Yeah, it’s been alright…

I move again tomorrow and funny enough I just ran into my new room mate at the gym and he gave me the keys so that I can make myself at home while he is at work. I told him he wouldn’t have to worry; I would have my bare feet on the table and pizza boxes spread out on the couch by the time he gets home.

When I was there to check the place out a few weeks ago he had the stereo on with music from Anna Ternheim streaming through the room, same kind I like. That’s when I decided to move in.

So I’ll let Anna seal this deal.